I am NOT feeling well today. Which makes more easily PO’d than normal. But, which also gets me thinking on the topic of medicines. If you’ve ever had one of those excruciating headaches that make you feel like you want to cry when you lay your head on the pillow, then I know you will feel me on this. Why, please tell me, do I have to have a degree in physics to be able to open the bottle of Excederin? It will take me literally 5 minutes of cursing under my breath and beating the bottle against the kitchen counter before I can figure it out. And, no, I can’t just read the instructions on the lid because a) they are the same color as the rest of the lid and b) my head hurts so damn bad that letters are blurry anyway!
Another thing that gets me is the new-fangled “mint” flavored Tylenol . I’ll let you in on a little secret: I don’t want to swallow it if it tastes like freaking toothpaste. Really, how about chocolate flavored or, even better, bacon flavored. Then I wouldn’t feel the need to gag every time I was trying to get a little sinus relief.
Also, why have we been able to come up with a drug that can make you puke, but not one that can make you stop puking? A stomach bug has to be the worst affliction (unless, of course, you’re on a diet) and yet we have no way to get even an iota of relief for it. We can suppress coughing, take something to improve our memory, heck, even make hair grow on a bald man’s head. Yet, every time I get a stomach flu I find myself face down on the cold bathroom tile trying to convince myself I’m not going to die. What’s up with that?
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