Filed under: General Peevery, Grammar and Spelling | Tags: annoying, Another great reason to adopt a puppy, church, drive me up the wall, finding God, finding Jesus, god, grating, heaven, jesus, nervous breakdown, peeve, pet peeves, pound, puppy, religion, sarcastic, sunday school, vent
The other day, on the way home from school/work, Smalls (my 4-year-old) asked me what God looked like. So, I tried to give her the line about God being in everything… blah, blah, blah… hey, I learned how to skip class back in Sunday school.
Me: Wrapping up yada yada speech
Smalls: Yeah, but what does he look like?
Me: Well, do you think God is a man or a woman?
Smalls: Actually, I know what God looks like. God is a puppy. I saw it on that show – you know, the one with the cat and the mouse. The cat is gray and white…
Me: You mean Tom and Jerry?
Smalls: Yeah, that’s it. I saw it on Tom and Jerry. Tom goes to heaven and God is a puppy.
Me: Glad you’re getting a religious education.
So, this little exchange sparked a thought in my mind (and, made me start singing Joan Osbourne’s song). You know what really gets me? When people say they’ve “found God/Jesus.” Now, I don’t have anything against the sentiment, it’s the semantics that drives me bonkers. What do you mean you “found” him? Was he hiding? Did you look away for a second and he ran into the clothes rack? Did you get a secret map with an X on it and go on an expedition? Did you type “Jesus” into your GPS? Because, it seems to me, if I was “looking” for God or Jesus, first I would go to Google Maps and if that didn’t work, I probably wouldn’t have to go much farther than the local church. Or, if you live in Small’s world, the local pound.
7 Comments so far
Leave a comment