Filed under: Anti-Peeves | Tags: annoying, anti-peeve, better than you, camera, children, drive me up the wall, grating, i am from poem, modeling, mother, nervous breakdown, peeve, pet peeves, poetry, pre-teen, sarcastic, smart-ass, vent
Apologies, I am my mother’s daughter. When I said I had a post coming late Friday night, what I really meant was almost midnight on Sunday. I’ve spent the weekend touring kiddie jump places and drinking vodka. Don’t judge.
Last Wednesday, I had a wonderful dinner with a fellow blogger and photographer (she would probably protest me calling her that, but her pictures speak for themselves) – Katie from You Are What You Eat… or, Reheat. She was taking pictures of Biggie and Smalls because, of course, while they jump up and down and simultaneously cross their eyes every time I’m behind the camera, when it’s a stranger they are all blinking eyelashes and smiles.
Katie (to Biggie): You are so pretty, you take great pictures, you could be a model.
Biggie: Actually, I’m going to be a marine biologist.
Peeved’s Friend (yes, I have at least 1): Well, you could model to pay for school to be a marine biologist.
Peeved: Yeah, mommy modeled a little when I was in high school. You could do that.
Biggie: You? Modeled? [giggle fit]
Peeved: Yes. And, I wouldn’t laugh if I was you. You look just like me when I was your age. I wasn’t always old, you know.
Biggie: Yeah, I look just like you. But, prettier.
Well, at least we don’t have to worry about self-esteem issues. Biggie is my mini-me in more ways than just looks, she also inherited my smart-ass attitude and ability to tell the honest truth. To prove to her that she does, in fact, look like me when I was her age, I pulled out some old photos. She chose the photo of me that she thought looked most like her and recreated the look for a photo shoot.
The next day, we were sitting down for dinner. I had just picked up Biggie from school and she was telling me about her day.
Peeved: How was school today?
Biggie: Good. Another boy asked me out. (This is the 4th in the past week.)
Peeved: Oh, did you make him fill out the survey your stepdad requires?
Biggie: Nah, he wasn’t worth it. Guess what?
Peeved: What?
Biggie: I wrote the best poem ever. You want to hear it?
Peeved: Sure… (getting on the game face…)
Biggie: Okay, the assignment was to tell where you are from.
Peeved: All right, bring on the ode to Long Island pizza.
Biggie: No, mom, this is really good. It’s the best poem, like, in the world.
I am from chlorinated pools, from law firms and from the restaurant business.
I am from the little, one story house. Small, comforting and the one that I sleep in.
I am from the venus fly trap outside, by the tree. Vicious, yet gentle in its own way.
I am from smudging my name on my cake and loud laughing. From [dad’s name] and Emily. I’m from the spoiled brats and mean little cousins.
I am from will you trust me.
I am from sleeping late and then eating and falling asleep again.
I am from many cousins and family members. From flan and cheese eggs.
Biggie: So, what’d you think?
Peeved: I think that was the best poem, in the whole wide world. Like, ever.
Yep, like me, only prettier, more confident, less modest. Me at 12 years old.
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Beauty and brains in mother and daughter…
Comment by gallowaygrave August 9, 2010 @ 2:28 amOh, yeah, she’s smarter than me too. 😉 thanks galloway!
Comment by perpetuallypeeved August 9, 2010 @ 9:27 amMe 2.1…
I found your entry interesting do I’ve added a Trackback to it on my weblog :)…
Trackback by Beat Alcoholism 101 August 9, 2010 @ 2:57 amYes, this is spam. But lovely spam it is. I bet the link sends you over to a page that says, “5 steps to saying no to pre-k birthday parties.”
Comment by perpetuallypeeved August 9, 2010 @ 9:24 am“I am from chlorinated pools, from law firms and from the restaurant business.” I think this is a very profound characterization of 21st Century Man and the
Comment by Carl D'Agostino August 9, 2010 @ 4:21 ammechanical, legal and capitalistic technopolis in which he lives. The chlorinated pool is the antithesis of the fertile primordial broth from which Life emerged only now to enshrine itself with lifeless “strictly business” sterility.
Um, yes, either that or… the industries in which her parents are employed. 😉
Comment by perpetuallypeeved August 9, 2010 @ 9:28 amYou two definitely look a lot alike!
Comment by thoughtsappear August 9, 2010 @ 7:52 amShe is undeniably your spawn. I mean look at that face. Her mouth even has the same uptorn that yours does. And yes, she is pretty, but that’s obviously because she looks just like her mom. And you’re sweet for giving me props so I’ll take the compliment and move along. 🙂
Comment by katie o. August 9, 2010 @ 9:21 amps. i meant upturn, not uptorn. what the hell is an uptorn? is that like a tretorn?
Comment by katie o. August 9, 2010 @ 9:22 amWhat the hell is a tretorn? I’m saving that on for “Words with Friends.” The compliment was well-deserved.
Comment by perpetuallypeeved August 9, 2010 @ 9:29 amhttp://store.tretorn.com/Default.aspx
Comment by katie o. August 9, 2010 @ 12:11 pmi thought we were close to the same age. (?) maybe this was a southern preppy kind of thing…who knows.
Katie – I’ll write it off as geographical differences… I’m sure you didn’t wear Z. Cavariccis? hee hee.
Comment by perpetuallypeeved August 9, 2010 @ 12:15 pm“I’ve spent the weekend touring kiddie jump places and drinking vodka. Don’t judge. ”
Not judging, just impressed. Vodka and jumping usually don’t mix.
Comment by Pop August 9, 2010 @ 2:18 pmJumping first, vodka second. 😉
Comment by perpetuallypeeved August 9, 2010 @ 3:31 pmI always get the order mixed up.
Comment by Pop August 9, 2010 @ 3:32 pmOut of those first two pictures—she was the one with the 80’s hairdo—shouldn’t that be the other way around? 🙂
Comment by Ron-Yves Strouteau August 9, 2010 @ 3:30 pmOh, yeah, she’s cooler than me too. 😉
Comment by perpetuallypeeved August 9, 2010 @ 3:31 pmWow, you really do own the “sarcastic” tag, don’t you? I took a shot at it today and failed. 🙂
I still have my special place, though.
Adorable pics in this post!
I’m now craving search engine placement for the phrase “vodka jumping.” I love a good challenge!
Comment by shoutabyss August 9, 2010 @ 7:25 pmYeah, stick to poop, Abyss! :). Thanks for the compliment. I wonder what comes up when you google “vodka jumping” hmm… I could think of a few things…
Comment by perpetuallypeeved August 10, 2010 @ 12:12 amdefinitely an anti-peeve. Great post. Great poem.
Comment by Conflicted Mean Girl August 10, 2010 @ 12:32 amThank you. Your blog title has me intrigued… going to get a little lost once I’m done with today’s post. 😉
Comment by perpetuallypeeved August 10, 2010 @ 8:55 amThanks. I’d appreciate the visit. You’ll be doubling my readership.
Comment by Conflicted Mean Girl August 10, 2010 @ 9:01 amYour daughter is adorable – as are you. great post!
Comment by The Simple Life of a Country Man's Wife August 10, 2010 @ 9:38 amWhy, thank you. Both for the compliment and stopping by to visit!
Comment by perpetuallypeeved August 10, 2010 @ 10:29 amLove her writing! Can she please be in my class this semester? Puh-leeeze?
Comment by Renee Schuls-Jacobson August 17, 2010 @ 9:36 pm