Perpetually Peeved

And the loser is…

Here is what is wrong with our society. Driving in to work this morning, they had a contest on the radio.  In order to win the contest, you had to guess the answer to the following question: 

According to recent poll, besides food & money, what’s the #1 item you’d like a lifetime supply of? 

Hmm... Books? Well, no, because you basically get that at the library. Although, I do loathe to return them (as is evidenced by my $30 overdue balance).

I know, I know!!! SHOES!!!! Yes, please. Third wish on the genie lamp for me... unlimited shoes!

 No?  What else do I need in life besides good books, money, food, and shoes?  I’m stumped!  Okay, let me think what the average person would say…

I got it! Gas. As much as we'd like to hold out hope, I don't anticipate those corn cars going into production anytime soon. And, while we're at it, can I get a little full-service as well?

Not it?  Okay, I guess I’m being too practical.  Let me think more on the level of the average American.  Ah, yes, that’s my problem – I’m not being materialistic enough!

Fancy clothes?


Enough sports cars to make Jay Leno drool? And enough accompanying vanity plates to make John Mayer cry?


...electronic pets? Toys?

No?  Hmm…  well, maybe I’m underestimating people.  What else is not a food, not money, but you would want an unlimited supply of?

BINGO! Skymiles...

... Embassy Suites rewards points?

... Unlimited admission tickets to aquariums, museums, parks and zoos throughout the world?

No?  Okee Dokee, not interested in traveling or learning about nature, other cultures or history. 

I give up.  Please, just tell me.  WHAT would Americans want a limitless supply of besides food and money?

A: Cable TV service! 

Yes, folks.  This is the problem with our society.  Forget A Tree Grows in Brooklyn, these people are only interested in A Potato Grows on the Couch. 

Which, is probably why they sell these at Toys R Us.

26 Comments so far
Leave a comment

Oh wowwww… that treadmill is so sad. What happened to the days when kids went outside to run and play!? I love your blog 🙂

Comment by Melanie

Thanks Melanie! I know, I have a whole post coming on what people are doing to their kids these days!

Comment by perpetuallypeeved

omg. I have no words.

Comment by pbandchutney

You’ve raised my bloodpressure. People are idiots. Why would you name food and cable, when you can buy both with the first, which is money. How about sex and sleep, though you can probably have those with enough money too. I’ll just choose money and isolation from idiots for my two things.

Comment by sfn

The question assumed you would chose food and money first, so it took them out of the equation. This was besides food or money what would you want an unlimited supply of. Isolation from idiots, now that’s my idea of heaven! 😉

Comment by perpetuallypeeved

How about years? Or at lest a coupla dozen.I’m not afraid to meet my Maker, just not any time soon.

Comment by Carl D'Agostino

I’d like to hang around a little while, but there’s an idiot-free heaven full of books, shoes, chocolate pecan pie and foot massages waiting for me out there! 😉

Comment by perpetuallypeeved

Ah, well… we want cable TV for the improved broadband internet it offers. sorry!

Comment by gallowaygrave

Sell-out! 😉

Comment by perpetuallypeeved

I’m nearly speechless. cable TV? Really? I would have gone for the skymiles. Excellent suggestion.

oh and the isolation from idiots is such a pipe dream. That sounds like a slice of heaven.

Comment by Conflicted Mean Girl

I know, right? Why settle for watching it on TV when you could be living it? I was flabergasted.

Comment by perpetuallypeeved

This falls under reasons why I dont take advice from the radio. Followed closely by the talk show stations that give fashion tips when all the mic jockies are single.

Comment by alcotsirk

Hmmm…I wouldn’t have picked cable. Did they only ask 50 people or what? LOL

Comment by Helle

Who knows. I asked my husband and he said, “Well, if I have money and I have food, then the only other thing I need a lifetime supply of is air-conditioning.” Good grief.

Comment by perpetuallypeeved

All I can think to say is “Wow”.

Comment by Jenni Engledow

I thought A Potato Grows on the Couch was a real page-turner, but I only read it during commercials.

Yet another very thought-provoking post and, somehow, now I feel peeved. Good job!

Comment by shoutabyss

No! No. I refuse to believe this is true. *clamps hands over eyes and ears*

Holy crap, why do I have so many hands?!

Comment by temmahkrik

As a writer, that so sucks. However, as a mom, I’ve a little hope: it increases the odds of my children becoming (well-read) world leaders and maybe then they’ll create change. I’m trying hard to make lemonade here; that’s the best I could do.

Comment by itslisa

Really enjoyed reading your work. You are so smart with a sharp wit. Back home we call that “snap”. Anyway, I can’t think of anything, including your suggestions that I would like a lifetime suppy of. I get board and/or tired of things over time. If not material, then perhaps a lifetime supply of love or happiness, that might be redundant. Regardless, I like it, I love it, I want some more of it. Keep writing.

Comment by Luke The Drifter

Yes, but Mad Men is on cable…

Plus? Now I can’t stop thinking about that pecan pie you mentioned.

Comment by Maura

Mmm… Pecan pie and Don Draper. I’ll be having good dreams tonight. 😉

Comment by perpetuallypeeved

wow. that is absolutely crazy, especially the treadmill thingy for kids. for christs sake, get off the couch!

Comment by whatsnormality

I know, right? Can I please get a lifetime supply of lazy escapism? Perfect. But, now I’m wondering if this has more to do with the ridiculous cost of cable these days…

Comment by perpetuallypeeved

LOL, good post. I can’t listen to radio shows for this reason! And yes, agree that people are idiots.

Comment by WorstProfEver

You mean they didn’t say radio? or contests? or even the tv that the channels would be summoned to? or the couch that their lazy butts would be sitting on? or facebook? Nothing surprises me anymore. I came to terms with the fact that people are stupid years ago. A person is ok, but get several persons together to make people and you’re doomed.

Comment by Amy

Seriously? You are surprised? I’m surprised people didn’t lump all screen technology in there. That is what most people do. They sit on their asses and watch Family Guy. I’m trying so hard to get people to value reading and writing. I’m glad there are smart people in the blogosphere.

Comment by Renee Schuls-Jacobson

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