Filed under: Consumer / Retail, General Peevery | Tags: annoying, As seen on TV, booty pop, consumerism, drive me up the wall, facial flex, grating, jesus diorama, marriage blanket, nervous breakdown, peeve, pet peeves, sarcastic, shopping QVC style, vapid society, vent, why do we buy this stupid shit?
The world is full of people selling crap. More inconceivably, the world is full of people willing to buy it. A friend of mine from across the pond sent an email asking if Silly Bandz was really as much of a craze as a BBC article was making it out to be. The answer: yes, my friend, unfortunately it is. There are Silly Bandz, Bandyz, Funny Bandz, Zany Bandz, Googly Bandz, Crazy Bandz, ad nauseam.
Who cares if they are RUBBER BANDS that serve no function? Who cares if they come in shapes that take a zoologist, herpetologist and/or Professor of Hieroglyphics to identify them? Kids love them. Parents spend $2.00 a pop (minimum) for TEN (10) RUBBERBANDS.
The worst part? This isn’t even the stupidest shit people buy. Have you ever woken up with the sudden urge to buy a:
Please click and watch the video – freaking perves.
It’s an epidemic. They have entire stores in our malls devoted to things “As Seen on TV.” Yes, Americans are stupid. If they see it on TV, they want it. If a celebrity wears it, they wear it. If you call it “art” and put a high price tag on it, they’ll have to have it.
This little diorama beauty was going for $65 at the flea market the other day.
Silly? Yes. Funny? Yes. Zany? Yes. Googly? Yes. Crazy? Abso-freaking-lutely!
Now, what kind of junk can I patent and make millions off of? Let’s see, they already have cat scratch emery boards, amazingly absorbent towels (how long does it take for THOSE to dry?), haircutting vacuum accessories, magic gravity balls, smokeless ashtrays… Hey, I got this bridge I’m selling! You interested?
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