Filed under: Anti-Peeves | Tags: annoying, anti-peeve, blog party, blogs, drive me up the wall, favorite blogs, friday! friday! friday!, grating, i swear it's low dose aspirin, i was framed, nervous breakdown, peeve, pet peeves, sarcastic, vent, wine
Don’t make a peep. I somehow finagled it so Biggie is out with a friend, Smalls is watching a movie and “camping out” in my room and I have a bottle of wine and Mr. Peeved’s fast, new laptop all to myself. [Insert evil laugh here.] My BIG plans for the night?
This:
and this:
Yes, folks it’s a regular old party. If I failed to mention your blog, the evite must have gotten stuck in your Spam box. Don’t worry, I’ve got you in my Blog Surfer. Like any good party, the comments should get good after the second glass (especially since I’ve decided to forego dinner in order to get a better buzz, quicker). Oh, and bring your friends – if I’m not reading someone I should be, let me know. Things should get interesting!
Kind of like this... Don't know who this guy is, but apparently after a drink (or 7) we grew very close. So close, that I had to get a photo memento. Alrighty, then.
Don’t worry, if anyone needs an aspirin tomorrow, I’ve got plenty.
This is the inside of my purse the other day... See that ziploc baggie?
I swear officer, they're low-dose aspirin.
Really, I just envisioned getting pulled over and going in for my license. Don’t ask how these got in there. It’s a long story involving a hellish day and a helpful friend.
Last night we went to curriculum night at Biggie’s school. Mr. Peeved wanted to see Biggie’s locker to see how it was decorated. I flashed him the pills, “Oh my God, wouldn’t it be funny if we pretended to bust her…[giggle]?…No?…Bad mommy?…Gosh, you used to be fun!”
Filed under: General Peevery | Tags: annoying, blogs, chainmail, drive me up the wall, email, facebook, grating, nervous breakdown, new kids on the block, peeve, pet peeves, sarcastic, The Versatile Blogger, vent
I won’t open any email that has more than 1 FWD in the title. Why do these people keep forwarding these jokes and inspirationals that became stale the same year New Kids on the Block became NKOTB? I’m sick to death of it. It also drives me insane when people post those chainmail crap things in their Facebook posts. Oh, you’re so clever, the “Red Giant Underwear” in your status is really your favorite color, your favorite sports team and something you’re not wearing right now. Good grief. In the spirit of spreading the peeve today, I’m going to share something with you.
Apparently, someone reads this blog. Why? I don’t know – maybe there really are masochists out there. Anyways, the sassy-pants over at The Whatever Factor has honored me with an award. She doesn’t know me well enough to know that this has already gone to my head and I have told all my friends to check out my “award winning blog.” I digress. So, this award requires me to tell you seven “fun facts” about me and my big head and then award 15 other bloggers the same honor. Hate me yet? Don’t worry, I know you don’t really want to know 7 “fun” facts, so I’m making my own rules – I will be listing 7 random peeves.
So, here (in no particular order) are seven things that make involuntary expletives come flying out of my big-ass head:
- Stepping in something wet when I’m wearing socks
- Dropping things and having to bend down and pick them up
- Seeing people dab their pizza with a napkin
- When they forget my spork at Taco Bell (have you ever tried to eat a Mexican Pizza with a metal fork? – gross)
- People who take EIGHT FREAKING YEARS to make a turn
- The sound of Gilbert Godfried’s voice
- When the Department of Torture has someone mismatch my socks and put them in my drawer (usually right next to a shirt that has been folded whilst still inside out).
Okay, if you hated this post, head on over to some really entertaining blogs:
- Living Dilbert (office humor that would be really funny if it weren’t true)
- The Friggin Loon (news of the weird, trust – it will make you feel better about yourself)
- Messed Up Parenting Tips (I don’t know for sure, but I think this guy may be serious)
- The Orifice (more office humor — I go there for the made up monikers alone – Indiana Douchebag, anyone?)
- Thoughts Appear (and they’re usually funny)
- Time to Make the Brownies (funny parenting stuff – scroll on down to I’ve Got a Grip on Guilt… A Nice Tight One – 5/11)
- Trailer Park Refugee (she had me at the title)
- You are What you Eat and Reheat (food! and funnies!)
- Zodi’s Blog (after my own heart, rants, raves, and isn’t afraid to use the word retarded)
- Fix it or Deal (check out the Retro Fun page)
- Stop Annoying Me (this was my first choice of blog name, but, alas, it was taken)
- Delicacies (an interesting writer-type)
- Straight from Helle (suburban fellatio – piqued your interest? check her out)
- Sargastic Irrevalence (everything from rocket science to motorcycle road trips)
- Pajama Days (love her writing)
- Go, Pop, Go! (a dad who knows how to cook a mean brisket – and, who doesn’t love that?)
- Hambo Central (if you can spot a filter in a tree and love a good acronym riddle – this is your guy)
- No Busy Signal (little nuggets to mull over)
- Ah, crap, now I’m over. Okay, check out anyone’s blog who comments too!!
For those listed, feel free to pass this along, or ignore it. Doesn’t make a shit’s bit of difference to me. HAND! (that was for you Hambo)
Perpetually Peeved 