Filed under: General Peevery, Road Peeves | Tags: annoying, bumper stumper, corvette, douche, drive me up the wall, grating, nervous breakdown, peeve, pet peeves, road rage, sarcastic, secret society decoder pin, spelling, tattoo, vanity plates, vent
Remember that cheesy game show Bumper Stumpers? Well, I freaking sucked at it. Majorly. So besides the fact that vanity plates are a telltale sign of douchery, I also hate them because they make me feel stupid. I don’t get it. Isn’t the point of a vanity plate to say something about yourself? I mean, after all, it’s not like you’re driving behind yourself reading it. It’s like getting a tattoo on your back – it’s not for your own enjoyment.
Ever since I started carrying my camera in my car console, I’ve seen a million of these. I’ve figured out maybe 2 (and those weren’t very hard). Here are some of the one’s I’ve seen – can you help alleviate my peeve and let me know what YOU think these mean?
This is one I figured out. But, admittedly, not before trying to remember whether loride was an element on the periodic table. (PS - this guy gets a double douche for non-vintage vette and vanity plate)
I'm still vacillating between Totally Tedious Douche and an advert for a new strain of venereal disease.
Really, you had to get a vanity plate for this? Surely, I'm missing a double entendre here...
You are a 12-month-old and someone just asked you if you need anything from the store? This one REALLY boggles me. I'm losing sleep over it.
Dick-Wad, Re-Waddable???
Sorry, the vanity plate name you have selected is already in use. We suggest: SEK1.
Either you really can't spell, or you just came up with a brilliant alternative to FUCKIT.
Oh - Oh - I get it! You're like Michelle Obama with a stutter.
Okay, I know it's not a vanity plate, but WTF? Has Shrek become a spokesperson for AT&T, moved to Georgia and purchased a used truck? I'm afraid to Google it.
Okay, readers (all 2 of you), break out your Secret Society Decoder pins. I expect your insights here!
Perpetually Peeved 